The Blur of Toddlerhood.

The toddler years can be beautiful, messy, exhausting, and transformative all at once.

In this episode I (yes the interview was flipped on me which makes me feel uncomfortable ha) share my experience of navigating the early years of motherhood and the profound shifts that come with raising young children.

 Together Fionnuala and I explore how parenting evolves from the baby stage into toddlerhood, the challenges of managing big emotions (both theirs and ours), and the often-overlooked journey of reparenting ourselves along the way.

We also talk about the importance of support, community, and maintaining connection with your partner and your own identity during a season that can feel all-consuming.

Whether you're in the thick of toddler life or reflecting on your own motherhood journey, this conversation offers reassurance, practical insights, and a reminder that you're not alone.

In this episode we discuss:

•  How parenting changes from the baby years to toddlerhood 
•  Managing big emotions and emotional regulation 
•  Reparenting yourself through motherhood 
•  The role of support networks and community 
•  Maintaining connection with your partner 
•  Protecting your identity alongside motherhood 
•  Why self-care looks different in this season 

A gentle and honest conversation for any mother navigating the beautiful complexity of the early years. 💛

Keywords: Motherhood, Toddlerhood, Parenting, Emotional Regulation, Self-Identity, Reparenting, Relationships, Support Networks, Early Years, The Mothering Project.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hello and welcome back to the Mothering Project. This is now our pod two and we've um call this the survival years. And I am still joined with our lovely co-host and guest Fanula Wiley.

SPEAKER_00 0:14

Hello Fanula. Hello Tina. I'm very excited for this episode, everyone, because I get it to Tina this time. So it's a little bit of a role rehearsal. So you're gonna get to learn a little bit more about your beautiful host in this episode today.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

Probably hopefully I don't cry. I interviewed a guest there not so long ago and they were like, God, I always cry on the podcast. Go easy.

SPEAKER_00 0:34

I'll just throw in some random questions that we haven't spoken about here. Um so this episode we are talking about the early years, so into toddlerhood and the early years of our little bubs growing to be that little bit older. And I'm not really there yet. So my um little lady has just turned one. And a few weeks ago, Tina said to me something about um something that can come up is like almost reparenting yourself as your as your bob gets a little bit older because you start to like actually have to parent when they come out of the cute Bubba stage where they're cooing at you and smiling and all of the beautiful things, and that's like, oh my goodness, I can't wait to hear what she has to say about all this. So here we are and we're diving in.

SPEAKER_01 1:22

Um you said you had a bad memory before we started. Um how did you remember that?

SPEAKER_00 1:28

So I'd love for us to just kind of start there, Tina, and for you to tell me a little and the listeners a little bit about I suppose what shifts from having a baby and then moving into those early toddler stages of childhood.

SPEAKER_01 1:41

It's such a shift because you do you go from I remember vividly, like you go from this cute baby that you put in the Prem and they go for a walk with you, and you get your steps in, you get your exercise, and they are very cooperative in that way to crawling and starting to walk and getting into all sorts of mischief inside in your house and pulling things down, and you know, like that's really the start of like the actual life as you know it, because things then you don't get out as much. So you can't just go to a cafe and sit them in the high chair because they don't want to be in there, or they start throwing their pancakes or whatever it is at you because they don't want to sit there. You right, we won't go to the cafe, we get takeaway coffees and we'll bring them to a park. Like I think the biggest change is like you said, the actual parenting style of yourself starts coming out, and the parenting style of your partner starts coming out, and you know, you've got this memory of how I suppose you were you were taken care of as a child, they've got their memory of how they were taken care of as a child, and then you have to start learning to parent this little person together and like find a style which we never talked about before we had kids, like we talked about the baby names and we talked about everything else bar okay, how are we gonna parent this toddler that won't do anything that we're asking him to do? I think there were so many stages. I remember I think vividly my favorite stage was probably around 12 or 13 months, and when they start walking and they look so cute and they turn into a little person, and I remember dropping Oshin off to his first day at daycare, crying my eyes out, like and I kept getting pictures of him looking really, really happy. Um, he did not miss me at all. There was a lovely educator that was in there, she was Irish, she was the director in the center, and she was always sending me these pictures, and she was like, There's no fear of him. And I'm like, that's what I'm worried about. My little boy does not miss his mother. I'm thinking around like the one and the twos, and then they go into daycare and they start finding their own personality. Like, that's really fun to watch. It's so cute to see how they interact with other little people and the little chats that they have over in the corner, and they're not even talking the same, you know, they're not even speaking words, but they're talking in their own language, and I think that just warms your heart because it does, you know, it just goes to show that people communicate in so much more ways. Well, but then there is the part like where I had to, and there was no chat GBT then or Claude, obviously backbed or any of them things to help your parent or to go, how the hell do you deal with this situation? But like the actual big feelings and the big emotions, like I feel like when I probably felt it most was around when Maggie was born or before Maggie was born, and Oshin was only a little boy himself, and he started getting all feelings of like he saw the cot going up, and then he'd start, you know, hitting me, and then he went into daycare, and I was getting reports that he was fighting with other kids, and that's just not him at all, but like it's them emotions that you have to deal with. And I think um that was the one thing that I probably learned really quickly is that you have to get a hold of your own emotions before you can help them with their emotions, and that's where you start doing the deeper work, I think, then in the middle years of right, I need to sort my own shit out before I try and you know help them. Does that answer your question?

SPEAKER_00 4:58

It does, and how incredibly emotionally aware you are to even like witness those things as they're happening and to notice, like, oh, my experience of being a child is coming up here, and my husband's experience of being a child is coming up here, and these are things that are going to be really, really helpful for me to look at. And I think that's what makes me such an incredible mum is having that ability to just reflect and notice and you know, have those moments in between when of course those big emotions and feelings come up to just see what's happening and take a little step back and um yeah, reflect and notice how you can the word you use was reparent yourself in those moments and um support yourself so that you can support your kids. So I just love all that you shared there and even like all of the beauty of um toddlerhood and all of the magic as well and how things can shift and evolve in a in a really beautiful way. Like there's so much duality in what you shared around how things change from having a baby to then moving into this stage. Um, and you mentioned something inside of that, Tina, around how your routines change so much. So you went from kind of like a baby following you around and following into your routine into kind of like being guided by them because they're now like asserting their independence of the things that they want to do. So, what did that, I suppose, survival mode look like for you day to day of dealing with the big emotions, dealing with the fact that your little one didn't want to do the things that you enjoyed anymore, like going for walks and going to a cafe and getting a coffee and those kinds of things? What did that look like for you?

SPEAKER_01 6:34

I really had to just step back, I suppose, in terms of like because you have to look after yourself, like and that's the one thing you know, you'll hear all the the different things on Instagram, you can't pour from an empty cup, and but it's so true because I was like, right, now I'm not getting out from my walks and I'm not doing you know that mint what the things that mentally made me feel better about myself and the things that helped me. So I had to find other things. I used to get up in the morning to gym to the gym before, like, say, Owen would go to work, because I'm like, that will make me feel a little better, bit better, or do some yoga before he went to work. Them little things that like, even if it was just once or twice a week, but you'd look at forward to them days, you're like, why do people complain about going to the gym? Like, this is absolutely heaven. Like it's all them things that you take for granted. I'm like, I used to be to moan about coming up here, and now I'm driving up going to take my time and get an extra coffee on the way home because you know it's my freedom. I think as well, like it's actually been around people that are going through the same stage, and I find that in all parts of motherhood, like you do have to settle up with people that are actually experiencing it's almost like the exact same like months as well. Because when you've got a newborn and somebody's got like a one-year-old, like we just laughed on the last podcast, like you forget, like you forget about them days and the the weeks, and like you forget about the sleep cycles, and you're back onto the next stage of motherhood. So you've forgotten all about what's happened then, yeah. And it's really good to learn from people before you, but also learn with people that are actually in that same stage as you. Connection is everything. So I I would always say to encourage people to get into a circle of people, and if it's not a mom's group, join one that you actually really, you know, will cherish and people that are like-minded. Because that's a killer, especially being over in in Sydney, and you know you can't pop over to your parents for a coffee, or you know, you can't just have your sisters over for a cup of tea. Like you do have to surround yourself with people that are actually in the same stage and the same, yeah, the same life as you.

SPEAKER_00 8:36

Yeah, so true. Connection is so, so helpful at every stage. And it's one of the really great things about being an expat, I think, because there are like so many ways that you can connect with your friends that having moved home, I think it looks a little bit different sometimes here because people are a little bit more spread out and um there is less like groups and things that you're kind of put into being part of, and people spend more time with their families. But it's so true what you shared there about the like the similarities and the stages that you're at and how just like helpful it can be to have a conversation with someone, even if the challenges are completely different. And that was something that I really noticed in my mum's group in the early days was you know, one person's baby might not be sleeping, and your baby might be sleeping really well, but you might be having a challenge with feeding, for example, or whatever. And it didn't matter that the things weren't the same, it was just like you're in the trenches and you can chat about what it's actually really like. So, yeah, I really hear you on that. Um, did you feel like you lost parts of yourself in this stage in all of that change around your own person and life and way that you've been leading your life before?

SPEAKER_01 9:46

I think, I think I did. Like, I think in terms of my purpose and my values, I talk about this all the time. Like everything shifted for me when I became a mom. I fought it so hard as well. Like, I remember going back after my maternity leave, and I only talked to that company recently about this. I remember walking in and I was like, you know, I'm back and nothing's changed, and I had red eyes. I was like, yeah, no sleep would be gotten for you know the nights before, especially after returning, you know, from your maternity lead. And I remember sitting there and I was so sick and my stomach, like I had all these stomach issues, and I was like, I've just totally changed as a person. Like I don't want to be in the 4:30 meeting. I want to be able to like leave, you know, on time at five o'clock and go and collect my child from daycare and have some time with them and not just bundle them into the car and you know, put them into bed and not really have any time with them. So I think all of that shifted for me, like my identities shift. It was like because I had that time off for the maternity leave, and I, you know, I look at people now that are like, Oh, I'm only gonna take six months because I know I want to come back to work. But in the 12 months, um, because when that baby's there and they start becoming fun at nine, ten, eleven months, you're not gonna want to go back to work. Like that's just a really precious time, um unless you obviously have to for financial reasons, but you know, if there's any way possible, it's a really precious time for you. Um and I think that that was the biggest shift, I suppose, in me. I left a few parts behind. I just thought I don't want to be this person or the martyr anymore, or the person that can get all this shit done and work because you know, actually they survived when I was gone for 12 months, and I survived when I was gone for 12 months, and that's when yeah, things started to probably shift for me personally and professionally.

SPEAKER_00 11:31

It sounds like your identity really expanded into all of the joy of motherhood, and this is something that I think about a lot since I became a mum, like how undervalued the role of being a mum really is, almost like you know, and obviously it's so incredible that women have fought so hard in history for us to be able to work and have our own purpose outside of being a mum and all of those things, and all of those things are incredible, and also it's so beautiful when you have that desire to be a mum. And I think sometimes that we can like almost make ourselves wrong for that in some way. Like, I should want to go back to work and I should want to like go back into who I was before when really your purpose has expanded like beyond the things that you did, and of course, and it makes so much sense. So thank you for sharing that because I definitely resonate with that as well. Like the definitely the desire to still have parts of me that were outside of being a mum, but then also like really just wanting to be immersed in all of the magic that is just there for such a short period of time.

SPEAKER_01 12:33

I mean, you know, like there's no even the little things like Maggie is gonna be starting school, you know, not next year but the year after. So I hold on to like Fridays off with Maggie, and when I say she is so happy when we drop Ocean off to school, and he's she's like, Mom, do you want to go and get a coffee? And like she just loves sitting down, getting a baby chino, doing colouring, and you know, we'll go off and we'll do swimming, she'll ask to go shopping. But I mean, like, I'm so happy I get to do that. Like, and I chose to probably change my circumstances a little bit so I could get to spend that time with her because I did the exact same with Oshin. I was like, the one thing I want to do is have that extra time with him. Um, you know, he still goes mad now on a Friday when he has to go to school and we've got the day off, but you know, like you're still connected him at three o'clock, so it's like such a short camp compact day anyway. I just think that's really special.

SPEAKER_00 13:21

So good that you've been able to set that up for yourself inside of the season. Was there anything that you really needed during those years when you reflect back that perhaps you didn't get or you didn't know how to ask for, or you wish kind of looked different when you reflect back now?

SPEAKER_01 13:39

I think it's just support and actually having honest conversations with my husband. Like, you know, there'd be times where you're just like, I need a Saturday off so I can just like go for three hours, and it's not even to meet anyone or do anything, but like I think when you're in the thick of it and you're the primary carer and you've got like them that are demanding all their time. We touched on it on the last podcast. I held a lot of resentment resentment and I wasn't very forthcoming in what I wanted. I felt like he should be a mind reader and you know, book the thing that I needed, or you know, send me off to a yoga um morning somewhere or a breathwork class. But like I should have just asked, I think, more and communicated more and told him when I was struggling because there was definitely times um in toddlerhood, I still, you know, like I struggled. I was like, oh my god, mentally, is this could this be postpartum um depression at like you know, two years of age? And then you start looking into it deep in the nighttime when you're awake. But yeah, I think it's just asking for more like more honesty and more support because it's lonely over here when you're it's just the two of you. Like it's it's literally, you know, when you're at home and you're in Ireland and you're surrounded by all your family. I know that you're probably still gonna be a little bit further distance away from some of them, but here it is the two of you. So you have to be a really good team and you have to be able to work together because otherwise it's bloody hard. Like if you can't. And I mean, I'm lucky and I'm fortunate. Like, Owen's obviously a really good dad, and he's hands-on with the kids and stuff, but like you are still the primary person that they go to.

SPEAKER_00 15:13

And I think there's so much conditioning around that, isn't there, for women where we're kind of like expected to do it all, or we feel like we should know how to do it all. And we have so many examples of that in society where we have like witnessed women trying to do it all, and even when you look at social media and things, it can look like everyone else has it all figured out how to do absolutely everything by themselves. And so, you know, even the act of giving yourself permission to ask can feel like a really big thing. And something that I know we touched on it before, but is such a really incredibly important gift to give to yourself is to learn how to ask with your partner, with your friends, with the people who can support you because um things have changed so much. And you know, women are working now as well as try to keep a home and look after kids and do all of those things, and it's literally impossible to do it all by yourself. Um, we need people, and we weren't designed to do it in silo.

SPEAKER_01 16:13

No, and I think as well, like it's almost like outsourcing it to people as well, like just you know, not friends and family, but like we get a cleaner every two weeks. I cannot wait for it till she comes. I'm like, please come and we're like the kids love her, you know, like they know her as well as I do. She's been with us now for like three or four years. My sister, when I was at home, made this like said to my fri my family, like my my other sisters, is your cleaner off now while you're at home? Like I have some kind of live-in nanny. I was like, she comes every two weeks. Yes, I've given her two weeks off, but um, you know, it's over here, it's probably more accessible, right? Because we're in the city and there's all of that availability. But like there's that, there's daycare. There's like sometimes now, even on a Friday. I love the time with Maggie, but if I'm feeling really stretched and I'm like, I just need to go and you know, have a massage and get my hair done or do my nails, or I need that time, like I don't feel the guilt as much by putting her in on a casual day because you know what? She does yoga in there in dense and on like a Saturday or a Friday, she doesn't care. But um it's just all the moments, I suppose, that you have to remind yourself that it's just like you have to kind of give back to yourself, yeah, and take the time.

SPEAKER_00 17:22

You mentioned your partner and some of what you shared there and the importance of maybe in a team and your relationship and how that kind of shifts in the season. Tell us a little bit more about that. What has that looked like in the early years? How did your relationship with yourself or your partner shift in that time?

SPEAKER_01 17:41

I think with myself, first of all, I'll start with that. It was actually learning to because I think while I was pregnant, you love your body. I loved my bump, I loved everything, and then your body changes, and then you start looking older because you're not getting as much sleep, and you know, everything just starts shifting, I think. So I think that's the one part I wish I went back and just appreciated my body a little bit more and in the earlier years when you're kind of trying to find your style again, the clothes that you once wore before being pregnant, just don't feel like you again, and then you don't want to spend money on new clothes because you're not working and all this shit that you do to yourself, and it's like just be happy with yourself, like look up everything that you've achieved and you know, take the steps to make yourself feel better. I think with myself, that's the key, anyway. Just go easy on yourself and actually just appreciate yours appreciate yourself even more and stop comparing yourself to fucking people that bounce back because sometimes you just don't, and you shouldn't either, actually. Society just has your condition to think it. And then with partner, like it changed with own, I suppose, in terms of we didn't have that time anymore to go off on our Friday drinks after work or Saturdays, you know, kind of lays around till 11 o'clock and go, let's go for lunch. Like then them times changed. I remember, I suppose, the little things that we did back in them times were, you know, we didn't have any TV, say on a Friday, and we just cooked dinner because it was around COVID times with Osheen as well. Um, but we made sure that we made them special kind of times for us to just sit there and talk, or not even talk, but just not like fidge out in front of a TV. We've recently just kind of got back into going out and date nights again, so getting a babysitter once a month, um, which is lovely because it's just like they put them to bed, they love the babysitter as well, she brings them presents, so then I always feel guilty and end up having to give her more money because like she's bringing them presents, but uh, you know, she's so beautiful, and like that's what I mean. It's almost like building like a nice support network for yourself and a group of people around you that like can support you because like obviously we don't have the access to our family. So for him, it's just yeah, I think we just need to make more of an effort, and like we kind of let it drop off for a while because it just got busy, but we are starting to reintroduce it again. It's important, so important.

SPEAKER_00 19:55

Um, yeah, I can hear what you're sharing there, is just how it shifts, is that there is less time. Um time becomes so filled with routines and sorting everything that comes with having kids outside of like your relationship, and it's so great whenever you can honour your relationship too, because it it helps everything, right? Like it helps you to parent better and be more content because that's such a big part of your identity in your life, as well as being a mum. So I love that you've brought back date nights and just times to spend time together and chat and have good conversations and those simple things that you can so easily let go of at certain times, especially when you're sleep deprived. Like I know there's nights where me and Thomas just lie up whenever Eva goes down to bed and we're either watching TV or scrolling or doing something because we're just so exhausted. Yeah. And we go to bed, and I'm like, oh my god, we barely even had a conversation today because it's just been so busy, and it's so important to just remember each other inside of all of that too.

SPEAKER_01 21:03

I was gonna say, has it changed somewhat with you and Thomas that you've noticed so far? Because you're a year in now.

SPEAKER_00 21:08

So yeah, I can definitely resonate with what you shared there about just how different life looks. Like I miss being able to lie in bed on a Saturday morning and like chat shit for a couple of hours before you get up for the day. Like those times are gone, long gone. So yeah, it has changed. I've seen that whole trend on social media. I don't know if you've seen it, where there's like lots of screenshots of text messages between couples once they become parents, and it's just like literally directions of what to get in the shop, or oh my she's still not sleeping, or whatever. Like your conversations just change so so much. So yeah, there's definitely been like a shift in that. And sometimes it can be challenging because you just want to like connect with your person again in the way that you used to. Um, so I've definitely felt that at times. And similar to what you've shared, like we really Have tried to make more time for each other when we can, and it definitely makes the weeks easier because you've had that little bit of time together. We got into such a routine of taking Eva absolutely everywhere, which I love and it's so beautiful. But we are now also reaching that stage where she doesn't want to sit in a in a cafe, she wants to be on the move, and so the things that we used to do are just not so enjoyable anymore. So yeah, it's great whenever you can kind of have a little bit of help every now and again so that you can just do things, just the two of you. Um because yeah, it's it's definitely not so much fun going for food now. I'm like, hurry up! Why have you not given it to us yet? I want to get out of here, and they're screaming, and you're just like, Oh my god, what happened?

SPEAKER_01 22:45

I just wanted to sit and have two coffees and like chill and totally oh you know, the newborn stage where you can just go out for long lunches and you know you're breastfeeding so you can have a glass of wine because you've just breastfed and like they still sleep for four hours, like they're the best. And then all of a sudden they wake up at four months and you're like, What the hell have we done?

SPEAKER_00 23:06

I know. My god, I read this book, someone recommended it to me, and I can't even remember what it's called now, but it was the worst book ever that I could have read in the beginning because the woman in it talks about how when you take your newborn out to busy places, they just sleep or close their eyes because they're overwhelmed. So, like, we would go somewhere and I'd be like, But maybe we shouldn't be here because now she's sleeping. And I look back and I'm like, I should have just enjoyed the fact that she was asleep and she was probably absolutely fine.

SPEAKER_01 23:34

It's just one person's theory. It's all these theories now though, because I mean, like, what did our mums do? You know, like they didn't have the theories or the you know, podcasts that talked about like all these different scenarios and Jesus, yeah, the sleep. I don't even think I touched on that, but like I used to get obsessed with sleep within. Um, I tried to train, do sleep training with Ushin, and we were like, I think we lasted up to three minutes of him doing the control crying. We're like, fuck this, we can't do it. Um, and I tried to do the same with Maggie, and yeah, it's just she didn't, you know, like they they don't have the same some people because you you compare yourself. So some people have the kids that sleep. I remember when the mother's in mother's um group and she's like, Yeah, um my baby sleeps from 6 p.m. until 7 a.m. and I'm like, What? Like Oshin sleeps at like 9 pm and he's awake at 5. How does that happen? And like, you know, she'd give you all the tips, but Oshin still gets up at 5 30. So like it's just the way they're programmed, and that's it. Have to roll with it.

SPEAKER_00 24:35

Just his body clock. Yeah, and I thought about that when we were talking earlier. I think also your journey as a mum looks very different if you have a baby who doesn't sleep and you're running on sleep deprivation versus if of course it's all of the transitions, regardless. But I definitely think that when you're not sleeping, everything can kind of hit that little bit harder at times. Yeah, I slept so well for the first four months. Like, I had this abnormally good sleeper in my mum's group, so I used to like silently sit back and not really say anything because I felt I kind of like felt bad that she was sleeping and nobody else's baby was. And then four months hit, and I was like, oh my god, what has happened? Um so yeah, and I can like really see how much easier it was whenever she was sleeping well because I wasn't sleep-deprived. Like everything is just harder when you aren't sleeping, it's just reality. Um yeah, so true. Um, I'm gonna finish out with this question, which is so a mum who's in this stage of their journey in the thick of it, what would you love to share with her?

SPEAKER_01 25:40

Well, I would love to just give them the nuggets of wisdom and let's um roll with it. Like, so in terms of like don't fight the fact that they don't want to sit in the cafe, just don't try and like because you'll be so pissed off at yourself trying to get them to do something that they don't want to do. So just adjust it to yourself. Go to a park, bring takeaways, you know, like make it easier for yourself at that stage of life. You know, when the and I just I witnessed it actually the other day, and it was so lovely to watch. But when your toddler is on the ground, kicking and screaming, having the biggest meltdown, just sit beside them, but like because actually nobody is watching you as much as what you think that they're watching you, like they're actually just probably sitting there hoping that they can eventually step in and offer to help you in some way. Because we've all been there. Like I sat there with one of my friends' mums the other day, and we were at the swimming pool, and they poor mother that like had a huge bump, right? So she was obviously due any minute, and like her little toddler was on the ground. Absolutely. I reckon it must have been 25 minutes of like screaming and roaring. And my heart, and I like the m the you know, the the mother that was with me was like, Do you want to go out and help? And I was like, I think I would just want to go out and see if she needs anything because I I remember them days so clearly with Oshin on the ground, and you're just like, you know, I obviously because you research it and you look more intimate now, like it was just his emotions were playing up because he knew that his life was about to change and his intuition was kind of kicking in, going, hang on, shit starts starting to feel really weird here because they're putting all this other stuff in the house. Um that's all it is. It's like give yourself a bit of grace and nobody's and if they are judging you, you know what, like that's on them. Like they've obviously forgotten how hard it is themselves, but generally people are really, really kind in then situations, so allow the help if if it's offered, and like sometimes it's just a break, a circuit breaker after that little kid too. So read the books, I think. If I was gonna tell anyone else any uh information, I would say listen to Maggie Dint, this beautiful like author, and she does like I'm listening to her audiobook now, the second one, and it's all about raising boys. And I really wish I listened to that when Oshin was like a little bit younger before he started school. So yeah, educate yourself, I think, on the little in the survival years, so like from one up until four and the tantrums, and try and get yourself across like what what's happening in their brains and what's developing for them.

SPEAKER_00 28:05

Love that, and I love what you shared about like that one person that you have found that really resonates with you because I think that that is really helpful when you find your person and you know that their way kind of is supportive of your values and how you want to parent and how you kind of view the world yourself, and when you can find that and just stick with it and let that be the thing that guides you, it can be so helpful. Like I know that in different seasons there's been people that I've really resonated with that has been so helpful, and then other things that if you started to listen to them, you'd be like, Okay, now I'm confused. Um, so it's great whenever you can just find someone that yeah, you resonate with and you can kind of take little tips and snippets with, and yeah, that understanding piece of what's happening for them and seeing the world through their eyes instead of like viewing it from are you not just being normal or the way that I want you to behave? Because yeah, so many things happen developmentally.

SPEAKER_01 29:00

Yeah, I think it's just you know, it we all say it, but it's a mother's intuition. We always know what's best for them. Um, you know, every one of us, like you've gone against it sometimes, and you're like, Why did I not listen to myself? I knew that they were like getting sick and that there was like an ear or you know, they may not have even been pulling that thing here, but you you I can always sense. I could always tell when Oshino's about to spike temperatures before he even spiked. It's like that, yeah, it's that in intuition. That's what's what we're there for, I guess, in terms of like looking after them and holding them.

SPEAKER_00 29:29

Tina, thank you so much for being so honest and vulnerable in your shares because I know that that is going to hugely support anyone who listens to this who's about to enter the season or is already in the thick of it. I think that something that is just so helpful about your podcast is the fact that we get to have these conversations when maybe we don't have other spaces to open up to the realities of motherhood. So it's been so lovely to sit on the interview side of this today. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 29:57

I was gonna say, and thank you, Fanilla, for being the interviewer. You went easy on me. So thank you so much.

SPEAKER_00 30:03

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 30:04

We'll we'll see you next time.

SPEAKER_00 30:06

See you next time. Thank you.